1:33 a.m. - 2011-03-24
The Fog of Whore
I know what I want to write, but not exactly how I should say it. It's for you, and you, but especially it's for her. I have been a colossal jackass through this whole 3 and a half year odyssey that was actually only a 2 night stand. When you went back with your husband for the last time, I said our last time together could be "just for tonight, no strings attached". Well it turns out I can't really handle the no strings thing at all. And as it should be glaringly obvious to all involved at this point, I can't be "just friends" with you after lusting after you for lo these many years. You may have suspected that I "liked" you, but I would have never had the strength to tell you that I do. Before, that is, I found a great therapist who is slowly getting me to suspect that I may be a desirable, funny guy with lots to offer someone. If that's not going to be you, so be it.
Basically, in summation: I'm sorry I didn't see your interest in me was as a casual friend and not someone you could ever see yourself dating. I was not in the right place mentally to see that then.
